The Gospel According to Prisco

You done so well against cancer, so let’s see if your magical powers will work against failure. 

I am performing tonight for an audience full of casting directors, agents, and managers to see if I can get representation.  It’s a three minute scene called “Work It Out”.  I play a fat lonely loser who has a heart attack while signing up for the gym.  It’ll be a stretch. 

I’m stretching for the finish line as I will be turning 30 in just 10 more days. 

Ain’t this been a month?  I’ve actually watched, and listened to, and read my way through a ton of shit.  I just haven’t taken the time to write in my usual taut and concise manners.  Mostly, because of other writing obligations.  I love to write.  And now I’m neckdeep in the motherfucker.  But it means I’m so busy writing, I can’t find time to write.  Riddle that, batdick.

It’s not a complaint, it’s an apology.  And if anything, it’s sort of like boot camp.  It’s forcing me to write every day, or at least sketch up outlines and whatnot.  I’m doing a Pajiba article a week, and I just joined a really nifty group of Pajibbidactyls at Blog Me A Tale.  Each month, there’s a new topic, and we’re to write a blog entry concerning whatever is there.  The first month was Open Mic, where we could write about anything.  I wrote about my first open mic experience in college.  It’s called Ode to My Penis.  Because someone’s got to class up the joint over there.  Don’t just read mine though, check out everyone else’s.  It’s a really awesome conglomerate of writerly folk.  I’m looking forward to my monthly contributions.

Also, in case you wonder why my interwebular presence is going to be lacksadaisical in the next month, it’s because I’ve signed on to do Script Frenzy!  Similar to my blast through 50,000 words on NaNoWriMo (half the novel I intend to complete this next go around) in one month, the idea is to write a 100-page screenplay in 30 days.  But since I’m a psychotic self-abusive asscock who can’t do anything the easy way, I’ve decided that I’m going to try to write 4 screenplays in a month.  One a week.  All horror films. 

If I get four plot outlines and character layouts worked up for these things, I’ll consider it a victory.  If I finish one, the website considers it a victory.  If I finish two, I’ll shit.  But goddammit, I’m going for four.  Higginbottom may or may not also be attempting it. 

If you are part of Script Frenzy, and want to join in, sign up at the site, then befriend me.  My username is CharlesDickensCider.  Because I am mature and witty.   I’m going to probably be on AIM for most of this, with the screenname Hooray4Pancakes.  So if you feel like shouting out to me, please do.  I may get distracted and cranky when it starts coming down to crunch time.  But hey, when am I not bitchy? 

I’ve honestly got about 15 reviews to post, that I’ve got listed at the top of this page, and I’m cranking through some other stuff that’ll go up for April.  Lawdy, lawdy, I’m already fucking exhausted and I haven’t even gotten into the grind of things yet.  Son of a bitch.

So awash throughout my little neck of the blogosphere is the story of Chez, a fellow who does some pretty fucking outstanding writing there at Deus Ex Malcontent, which is conveniently located at www.deusexmalcontent.com.  I’m not exactly cyber pals with Mr. Chez, but the bullshit that was delivered unto him is something I live and dread.

Chez used to work at CNN.  For almost four years.  I say used to, because they unceremoniously shitcanned him the other day.  Because of his blog.  Not because he was writing the blog.  But because of the content.  Supposedly, Chez did not run his informative and unflinching material across the folks there at CNN, so they felt it violated some policy or other, and basically, they gave him the royal screwjob.  Chez lives in New York with his wife and a baby on the way, and essentially, he’s out of work now, thanks to their bullshit policies.

Childrens, please kill CNN with your hate rays of hate.  As I said, I don’t personally know the man, but still, that’s bullshit anyway you slice it.  So fuck CNN, and yay anyone smart who hires up Chez and gives him lots of money for being witty and urbane.

And while I’m whoring myself out on noble causes, I added a link to my original blog, Righteous Indigestion, which is my quest to not weigh as much as a small truck.  It’s pretty intensely personal, and it’s mostly me bitching about my attempt at doing the Master Cleanse, and then my attempts at losing weight and then gaining surprisingly not that much back, and now my attempts to work out and such.  For most people this is incredibly boring, and annoying.  I try to have fun with it.  Besides, I like to complain.  So there it is, for you reading displeasure. 

Trimming the fat: sometimes it good (me!) sometimes it bad (CNN). 

Since going on my creative, self-imposed hissyfit, I’ve been neglectful in my….is that a word?  Neglectful.  I declare it so!

Anyway, I didn’t tell you about websites you should check out.  So now I will!  And I will actually post them up on the side of this bitch!

Uncooked Meat is the impressive font from which TK professes the glory that is he.  I’m an angry person, but TK is Boston Angry.  Which means he doesn’t pronounce “r”s when he calls you a moth-ah fuck-ah.  But he’s a source of glorious amusement.  So dose up fools!

Bend the Round is the impressive quest of my dear friend Matt Wolfe’s significant other.  She is determined to read 100 books, run a marathon, and I don’t know, knit a sweater for Snuffleupagus.  The best part of the blog is that now she is sharing her wit with the internet world!  Also, she is mostly responsible for the length and girth of my reading recommendations and my need to play Kingdom of Loathing.  An adventurer is me!

Cheeseburger Victim is the blog of Joey Rittenhouse, who is long overdue for having his writing online.  He’s one of the strongest journalists I’ve ever had the priviledge of working with, and his incredibly personal blog will damn near break your heart.  Plus, its good to know us big guys can stick together and it has nothing to with sweaty vinyl. 

Websters is My Bitch is the offshoot of Pajiba!, in that it’s their gossip blog.  It’s like what Perez Hilton does, if he had talent or accuracy, or intelligent fans, or if he were human.  Actually, it’s nothing like Perez Hilton.  Fuck Perez.

If you would like to be part of this, I might just start adding people willy-nilly.  Mostly, because I like the word willy-nilly.  So drop me a word or tenteen.

Woweeewowwowsers.

Once again, Pajiba! has fueled a rampage on my page thanks to my hipster discourse.  Now the page is growing into what I had intended, free exchange of ideas and people throwing suggestions back and forth.  I LOVE IT!  And all it took was me venting my natural curiousity towards everything that’s wrong with the world.

And I see that it’s catching on like wildfire!  Mr. Wolfe, of the charming Filled With Monkeys, among others, have been posting little mini reviews on their pages, letting everyone else know what they think.  And I disagree most of the time!  And that’s the beauty!  Because now I can say, what the hell is wrong with you?!  And they can throw it back in my face.  Yay!  Seriously though, it is pretty badass.

Anyway, I wanted to direct your attention to a few other links that have been added for your enjoyment and pleasure. 

The Quilosophy of Quilly is the ruminations of my buddy Clemmer, who has made himself a legend in his own time, if not for his witty insights, then at least for his manic, room encompassing karaoke rendition of “Welcome to the Jungle”.   He’s just blossoming as a bloggo, so show him some love as he begins expanding his horizons and riddling you with his Quenglish. 

Then there is the darling Beckylooo’s If A TV Falls in the Woods.  A more sagelike page on the writer’s trade you would be hard pressed to find.  She’s been a beacon of writerlyness in the time of the strike, letting people know how the non Joss Wheedons are doing thanks to the fucktardening of the studios.  I would admire her for this alone, but she was also kind enough to offer a stranger some advice in dealing with this town and its rampant shenanigans.  She’s everything that’s right with writing.  Even if she likes reality TV.  Read on!

Again, now that my tens and tens have grown to fifteens, if you would like to drop me a friendly (or unfriendly) hello with suggestions of things to read, watch, or listen, please do so at priscogospel@hotmail.com.  Also, if you would like me to link up to your page.  Feel free to link my page with wreckless abandon. 

And now, to shoot myself in the head and inspire others to do so.  (This is an obscure movie reference.  If you get this, you are awesomecredible.)

Ah, the love is shiny and fresh and new this week, like a gentle snow that carpets your lawns and cars.  Presumably.  I don’t know anymore, because I live in Southern California now, and everything goes grey and rainy.  But at least I don’t have to shovel rain.

As I watch my nefarious little project come to fruition, I gather new followers and admirers to my flock.  Most of whom are to be admired themselves.  So to your immediately left, you will find two more blogs for your eyes to giggle at.

Filled With Monkeys! is the illustrious Matt Wolfe’s blog, randomly updated whenever the mood should sway.  Matt, besides being a superb friend, has been my artistic boot in the ass, pretty much catapulting me towards my creative glories.  Matt was the one who read a short story and told me, “Dude, just make it a play.  You’ve been in enough of them.”  And thus began my career as playwright, which led to my screenwriting career.  And this year, he started me on National Novel Writing Month, which restarted the stalled motor of my writing.  He also was the one who convinced me to get blogging on my own.  So all this is his fault.  Hit him snowballs.

Hispanic! At the Disco is the blog of one of the illustrious Pajiban commentators, Manny.  It’s hard not to like Manny, if not for his witty and mean-spirited commentary, then at least for his fine Lucha Strongbad mask.  He’s a fine example of why federal agents need funding to patrol the internet.  I am a fine example of why Megan’s Law is in effect.

I have made it a rule to get permission before linking websites (except Pajiba!  I just took you like I wanted you and you liked it, didn’t you?  DIDN’T YOU?) to my own.  So if you want to share in the sparkly shiny love, and have even more random strangers look at your unmentionables, please, drop me a loving email at priscogospel@hotmail.com

Also, since I’ve been hurtling past the one book, one new artist, one movie parameter I’ve set for myself, more suggestions are always welcome.  Me likey food. 

If you think I’m awesome, as well you should, then you need to follow those happy little links of mine to even more exponential awesomeness. 

Pajiba!  is the bitchiest, snarkiest cultural review site this side of the universe.  It’s pretty much my inspiration for how I’m breaking down my reviews.  You will seethe with rage as you read some of the reviews, and especially the comments.  Oh, will you seethe.  I know I do. 

the jb show is my dear friend John Berry’s blog for his job at the newspaper.  John’s been my friend for longer than I care to remember, and he’s essentially ruined me for other men.  He’s a source of much goodness in my life, particularly music wise.  Also, the dude names his cats after characters in Chuck Palahniuk novels.   How fucking awesome is that?  Well, it’d be much awesome if he wasn’t a dude.  Who owns cats. 

Thrift Store Music is the excellent Shepard Ritzen’s album review site.  After years of scouring the bins at yard sales and independent record stores, Shep is cataloging his entire collection.  It is a stunning and impressive undertaking.  You would do well to go and be school by the knowledge and expertise he’s throwing down.  Shep and I are coming up on almost 25 years of friendship, which is all the more impressive because we are basically pushing 30.  He is essentially one of the greatest people in the world.

Would you like to be showered with love?  Hit me up at priscogospel@hotmail.com, with your website and I’ll link you up.  Also, if you have any literary/musicalary/filmary suggestions.